I have a kidhood friend on his way to Japan. He's a nuclear physicist at MIT. I am compelled to watch the evolving tragedy on CNN. I am compelled to learn everything I can about rod containment systems. And I am compelled to watch, to look, to stare to see if I see Alan's plane flying across the TV screen.
Ridiculous. This is my shock showing. My personal nuclear 'meltdown.' I wish it were me doing the heroics of flying into the irradiated, formerly beautiful seaport of our allies. In my powerlessness, I instead sit and stare. I am amazed at the stalwartness of the Japanese people. Where is the emotional chaos? The looting of what's left? The neighbor-turning-against-neighbor of the Darwinian America?
Many have nothing, and have lost home, friends, and family. Stunned living legacies of lives that were formerly great-- but have become even greater in my eye.
I turn a selfish eye inward and wonder how I would behave in these circumstances if I were one who survived. I would never, could never, have such grace and dignity. Such resilience.
And I am ashamed at the riots that would take place after the U-M/MSU football games.
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